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 Posted:   Aug 21, 2011 - 2:43 PM   
 By:   Mr. Marshall   (Member)

People are cursing in a film more then they do in real life in so many situations, and i have been around this world alot.

That happens alot in porn. When performers want to show they can also "act" they say "fuck " constantly
lol!

 
 
 Posted:   Aug 21, 2011 - 4:28 PM   
 By:   Octoberman   (Member)

How about the "magical hand wave" people do to close the eyes of a dead person (i.e. just waving your hand over the face of a dead loved one will cause their eyes to magically close and remain closed, even though it's plainly obvious the hand never came anywhere near the dead character's eyelids)? I saw it most recently in Rise Of The Planet Of The Apes, of all things.

Unless rigor mortis has already set in, I think you can do that for real. It's just a matter of knowing how to crook your hand...but that's just my theory.



You are correct. It's not just a theory... it's true.

 
 Posted:   Aug 21, 2011 - 9:53 PM   
 By:   Mr. Marshall   (Member)

The victim/suspect in a case always has a set of matches from the restaraunt/bar he visited the night before in his coat pocket, thus enabling the cops to trace his whereabouts.

btw do bars and clubs still make personalized matches? with all the smoking bans it seems unlikely

 
 Posted:   Aug 22, 2011 - 4:20 AM   
 By:   Jehannum   (Member)

How about the "magical hand wave" people do to close the eyes of a dead person (i.e. just waving your hand over the face of a dead loved one will cause their eyes to magically close and remain closed, even though it's plainly obvious the hand never came anywhere near the dead character's eyelids)? I saw it most recently in Rise Of The Planet Of The Apes, of all things.

Unless rigor mortis has already set in, I think you can do that for real. It's just a matter of knowing how to crook your hand...but that's just my theory.



You are correct. It's not just a theory... it's true.


You're saying that you can wave your hand near (but not touch) a dead body's eyelids and they will close?

 
 Posted:   Aug 22, 2011 - 6:29 AM   
 By:   Scott M (Oldsmith)   (Member)

Well, yes, if they had an electric eye. :-D


One thing that bothered me specifically in the Steven Seagal films (when they were at their most successful) was that nobody could lay a hand on the guy. Doesn't matter how many punks or fighters, none of them could connect. That totally stole the suspense or danger. It was meant to be bad-ass, but it just made it even m ore of an ego driven fantasy (especially once he got fat).

On Deadly Ground was the "best" of these fantasy epics, and no coincidence that Seagal directed it himself. He's in the bar beating up some townies. None of them touch him, but he keeps cracking them in the jewels, resulting in the hysterical screams of "My NUTS!!!" and "My BALLS!!!" Seriously, even if you could speak at that moment, would you really yell that? Or even "my ARM!!!" or "my LEG!!!" (if I make an action flick, someone's getting kicked in the nuts and that guy's gonna scream "my TESTES!").

Back to general action flicks, I "love" the "fall from a helicopter into a hotel roof pool and even though it's only about 5 feet deep, you're okay!" maneuver…

This thread has been hysterical. I'm running dry of examples, but this has been a fun ride.

 
 
 Posted:   Aug 22, 2011 - 7:19 AM   
 By:   dragon53   (Member)

1. There are always empty take-out containers of Chinese food with the red pagoda on the side on the coffee table of an unkempt apartment.

2. The hero, armed only with a pistol, kills a bunch villains carrying submachine guns, but he never stops to pick up their submachine guns and ammo (DIE HARD being the exception).

3. A special forces team is sent to a secret underground lab to kill a monster that was created by a Pentagon genetic experiment to create the perfect killing machine.

4. The police detective's wife and children were killed by villains and now he lives in a run-down apartment with empty cartons of Chinese food with red pagodas on the coffee table, a stack of unwashed dishes in the sink and only a can of beer and spoiled milk in the refrigerator.

5. A burned-out, retired CIA agent is called out of retirement to track down a mole in the agency.

6. In car chase scenes, the cars knock off the open door of a parked car, crash into vegetable stands and almost hit a woman with a baby carriage.

7. A special ops agent is assigned to stop a dangerous menace, and he must team up with the world's greatest expert on that menace who happens to be a female with a doctorate from MIT and used to be his former lover.

8. All movie and tv lawyers graduated from Harvard law school at the top of their class.

9. Movie villains are renegade CIA, military officers or national security advisers.

10. Movie and tv kids are always precocious and the little boys always have bangs.

11. There's always someone who knows how find a car with unlocked doors and hot-wire a car in five seconds when the heroes are trying to escape from the villains.

12. Monsters burst out of people's chests.

13. Movies are set in "cool" cities---New York, Los Angeles, Miami, New Orleans, Seattle, Chicago, San Francisco, Washington, DC.

14. The hero flees, with villains in pursuit, through a restaurant kitchen with food flying everywhere while the kitchen staff look on in amazement.

15. People wake up in bed with hair perfectly in place and the women have makeup on.

16. The sniper is about to pull the trigger when a truck passes in front of the victim and when the truck has passed, the victim is gone.

 
 
 Posted:   Aug 22, 2011 - 8:33 AM   
 By:   CinemaScope   (Member)

Well, yes, if they had an electric eye. :-D

On Deadly Ground was the "best" of these fantasy epics, and no coincidence that Seagal directed it himself. He's in the bar beating up some townies. None of them touch him, but he keeps cracking them in the jewels, resulting in the hysterical screams of "My NUTS!!!" and "My BALLS!!!" Seriously, even if you could speak at that moment, would you really yell that? Or even "my ARM!!!" or "my LEG!!!" (if I make an action flick, someone's getting kicked in the nuts and that guy's gonna scream "my TESTES!").

This thread has been hysterical. I'm running dry of examples, but this has been a fun ride.


My vas deferens!

The answer to all this is so easy. The producer (the proper producer, not one of the 15 names you get on the credits) director & writer get together for a few days, turn off their cell phones & walk through the script, line by line & scene by scene, & elbow all the tired old cliche lines & set up's.

 
 
 Posted:   Aug 22, 2011 - 7:00 PM   
 By:   dan the man   (Member)

In modern films it looks like it is over, but it is not, so you put your coat back on the seat, then again it looks like it is over but it is not and you put the coat back on the seat again, on and on and on and on and on.

 
 Posted:   Aug 22, 2011 - 8:31 PM   
 By:   Mr. Jack   (Member)

...everything is bathed in shades of Teal & Orange? mad God, I hope this little cinematography/color timing fad goes away soon.

 
 
 Posted:   Aug 24, 2011 - 10:17 AM   
 By:   Thor   (Member)

16. The sniper is about to pull the trigger when a truck passes in front of the victim and when the truck has passed, the victim is gone.

Ah yes, that's a good one.

Falls in the same category of someone who's there one second, but not there the next -- in NON-supernatural films!

 
 Posted:   Aug 24, 2011 - 12:34 PM   
 By:   Scott M (Oldsmith)   (Member)

Actually, getting a little tired of post end credit epilogues. Whatever happened to just having a cool ending?


This whole thread is why I think Last Action Hero is the funniest take on the genre. I especiallyliked how a car, sailing over a cliff, explodes in mid air for no reason.

 
 Posted:   Aug 24, 2011 - 1:00 PM   
 By:   Mr. Marshall   (Member)

two guys fight - one falls and hits his head. It appears he is unconscious
another guy says "He's dead!" It was an accident, go to the police"
first guy says "no one will believe it was an accident, we got to get rid of the body"

does hiting your head ALWAYS end ina fatality? in movies like this it does

 
 Posted:   Aug 24, 2011 - 3:24 PM   
 By:   SBD   (Member)

How about the "magical hand wave" people do to close the eyes of a dead person (i.e. just waving your hand over the face of a dead loved one will cause their eyes to magically close and remain closed, even though it's plainly obvious the hand never came anywhere near the dead character's eyelids)? I saw it most recently in Rise Of The Planet Of The Apes, of all things.

Unless rigor mortis has already set in, I think you can do that for real. It's just a matter of knowing how to crook your hand...but that's just my theory.



You are correct. It's not just a theory... it's true.


You're saying that you can wave your hand near (but not touch) a dead body's eyelids and they will close?


Never said near. I'm not sure how the eyes would close if you went for near.

 
 
 Posted:   Aug 24, 2011 - 4:09 PM   
 By:   dan the man   (Member)

some real terrible person seems to be getting away with something by film' end, i love moral plays.

 
 Posted:   Jan 1, 2012 - 6:51 PM   
 By:   Adam B.   (Member)

After a driver of a car is shot and killed, the car accelerates out of control.

a) The run-away limo in True Lies

b) General McCallister's car in Lethal Weapon

c) I'm sure there are other examples......

 
 Posted:   Jan 1, 2012 - 8:23 PM   
 By:   Altamese   (Member)

After a driver of a car is shot and killed, the car accelerates out of control.

a) The run-away limo in True Lies

b) General McCallister's car in Lethal Weapon

c) I'm sure there are other examples......


It can happen. Body goes in to instantaneous rigor...

A cliche that probably pleases the guys but annoys me no end... girl wearing a shirt that covers her belly button...then by some mechanical means her shirt is ripped so she plays the rest of the scene with the belly button exposed.

Mary Jane in Spiderman 1
Princess Amandala in... was it the 2nd movie in the trilogy?

 
 Posted:   Jan 1, 2012 - 8:37 PM   
 By:   Mr. Jack   (Member)


A cliche that probably pleases the guys but annoys me no end... girl wearing a shirt that covers her belly button...then by some mechanical means her shirt is ripped so she plays the rest of the scene with the belly button exposed.

Mary Jane in Spiderman 1
Princess Amandala in... was it the 2nd movie in the trilogy?


Also, when a character's clothes start disintigrating during the course of an action movie (male or female), their pants will always remain intact enough to cover the Naughty Bits. wink See Wolverine in X-Men 3.

 
 Posted:   Jan 2, 2012 - 1:35 AM   
 By:   The REAL BJBien   (Member)

I understand why each of these things happen [ its a movie after all ] but I just hate that they do regardless:

1 - Having a plan and then none of it working/used like in FAST FIVE. About an hour from when the team is assembled to when the final heist is pulled off, most if not all of the planning put in to the job is NOT used and even more comical is how basic the final heist is since they just drive a big car through a wall and then pull out the safe.

I also hate how they have one guy who is suppose to a bullshitter/fast talker and when it is time for him to actually step up, he can't because it is a man he is suppose to charm rather then a woman.

2 - Cars that always look perfect as seen in DRIVE and DOOMSDAY. If you watch films like THE BOURNE TRILOGY or CASINO ROYAL and QUANTUM OF SOLACE, you will see cars crashed, smashed, and destroyed and remain that way while in DRIVE, you will see Driver t-bone a car violently off a cliff and then in the next shot still have the front hood and headlights intact.

DOOMSDAY takes it to another level as we see a Bentley drive through an exploding bus and still not have a scratch.

3 - Getting hurt ONLY when it matters as seen in MISSION IMPOSSIBLE - GHOST PROTOCOL. Tom Cruise takes some SERIOUS falls, tumbles, hits, and punishment in this film all with little to no effect but it isn't til the finale when he fits the villain that a simple kick to his knee hobbles him and of course, this is the one time when he needs to faster then the bad guy.

Why couldn't he have been shot in the leg instead?

 
 
 Posted:   Jan 2, 2012 - 1:43 AM   
 By:   Graham S. Watt   (Member)

Something that is really daft, and which should have been fixed by this stage in movie-making history, is when two people are talking and one interrupts the other. The first invariably halts in mid-syllable, then there's a short gap and THEN the other person interrupts.

 
 
 Posted:   Jan 2, 2012 - 1:47 AM   
 By:   Thor   (Member)

Something that is really daft, and which should have been fixed by this stage in movie-making history, is when two people are talking and one interrupts the other. The first invariably halts in mid-syllable, then there's a short gap and THEN the other person interrupts.

Does that really happen very much in professional films these days?

 
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