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 Posted:   Jan 31, 2012 - 7:31 AM   
 By:   Heath   (Member)

A guy getting kicked or punched in the groin and screaming "MY NUTS!" Anyone who has been kicked in the jewels will tell you - there ain't no talking going on for about 5 minutes. Or breathing for that matter.

LOL. He screams MY NUTS? That movie I haven't seen. Wish I had. big grin


Steven Seagal's "On Deadly Ground." In a bar fight, he grabs a guy by the stones (there's a crunching sound dubbed in to make it more fun) and the guy screams "my NUTS!" Later, in the same fight scene, he kicks another dude in the groin, who then shrieks "my BALLS!"
.


LMFAO. big grin That's verging on Mel Brooks territory. Sorry, but suddenly I have a lot of respect for Seagal's hitherto unsuspected comic genius (although don't quote me on that).

EDIT: Just peaked at that scene on youtube. Has to be said, the picture you painted in my head was a tad more Blazing Saddles than what Steve actually came up with. Still, the vision was funny while it lasted. wink

 
 Posted:   Jan 31, 2012 - 8:30 AM   
 By:   Scott McOldsmith   (Member)

LOL Sorry! It's still pretty damned funny in its absurdity.

 
 Posted:   Jan 31, 2012 - 8:08 PM   
 By:   Mr. Jack   (Member)

The headbutt thing bugs the HELL out of me. The person delivering the headbutt won't even wince, while the recipient will always either be knocked unconscious, or else badly incapacitated. Just once, I'd like to see a movie with a headbutt where both participants are left holding their heads and groaning in pain. big grin

PAUL BLART: MALL COP (of all things) took the piss out of this. Blart head-butted a bad guy. Bad guy got knocked out and Blart, momentarily woozy, was left to remark, "Nobody wins in a head-butt."


Dude, do you really want to admit you've seen Paul Blart: Mall Cop?

 
 Posted:   Nov 18, 2012 - 10:36 AM   
 By:   random guy   (Member)

when the henchman delivers bad news to the boss and ends up getting killed for it.
you'd think by now these henchmen *whom I assume are unionized* would just make a phone call instead of going in person

 
 
 Posted:   Nov 18, 2012 - 11:11 AM   
 By:   CinemaScope   (Member)

Ah, wecome back to the best thread on this site! When people are playing poker, usually in westerns, they win with four aces (never just a pair) & the guy loses with three kings. It's always some fantastic hand.

 
 
 Posted:   Nov 18, 2012 - 11:36 AM   
 By:   Tall Guy   (Member)

The headbutt thing bugs the HELL out of me. The person delivering the headbutt won't even wince, while the recipient will always either be knocked unconscious, or else badly incapacitated. Just once, I'd like to see a movie with a headbutt where both participants are left holding their heads and groaning in pain. big grin



Jack, a proper headbutt involves the strong convex of bone at the front of your head and the squishy cartilage of the other guy's nose. You don't have to exert so much force that you knock out the other guy, just enough to inflict pain, blurring of vision (through immediate eye-watering) and disengagement from the struggle. Accuracy of the headbutt is much more important than force. Done properly, it doesn't actually do the butter remotely as much damage as it would the buttee.

TG

 
 Posted:   Nov 18, 2012 - 11:42 AM   
 By:   Buscemi   (Member)

...when certain actors (I'm looking at you, Jennifer Lawrence) play the same goddamned character yet again but we, the audience, are supposed to accept it?

 
 
 Posted:   Nov 18, 2012 - 11:44 AM   
 By:   CinemaScope   (Member)


Jack, a proper headbutt involves the strong convex of bone at the front of your head and the squishy cartilage of the other guy's nose. You don't have to exert so much force that you knock out the other guy, just enough to inflict pain, blurring of vision (through immediate eye-watering) and disengagement from the struggle. Accuracy of the headbutt is much more important than force. Done properly, it doesn't actually do the butter remotely as much damage as it would the buttee.

TG


Ah, the "Glasgow Kiss".

 
 
 Posted:   Nov 18, 2012 - 12:04 PM   
 By:   Tall Guy   (Member)


Ah, the "Glasgow Kiss".

Get that stetched, Jimmy!

 
 
 Posted:   Nov 18, 2012 - 2:51 PM   
 By:   quiller007   (Member)

Jack, a proper headbutt involves the strong convex of bone at the front of your head and the squishy cartilage of the other guy's nose. You don't have to exert so much force that you knock out the other guy, just enough to inflict pain, blurring of vision (through immediate eye-watering) and disengagement from the struggle. Accuracy of the headbutt is much more important than force. Done properly, it doesn't actually do the butter remotely as much damage as it would the buttee.

TG



You've done a lot of this, have you? wink

Den

 
 
 Posted:   Nov 18, 2012 - 3:10 PM   
 By:   quiller007   (Member)

this thread should be REQUIRED READING for all aspiring screenwriters!


Let's face it though. If everything happened in movies the way it happens
in real life, movies would be utterly boring. All this cliched stuff
are neccessary conveniances (contrived as they may be) to move the plot
along more quickly. All this stuff you guys listed IS funny though.

Den

 
 Posted:   Nov 18, 2012 - 3:43 PM   
 By:   Mr. Jack   (Member)

Ah, wecome back to the best thread on this site! When people are playing poker, usually in westerns, they win with four aces (never just a pair) & the guy loses with three kings. It's always some fantastic hand.

Plus, in every card game, EVER, in a movie, the winner will be the one who reveals their cards last.

Every. Single. Time.

 
 Posted:   Nov 18, 2012 - 7:37 PM   
 By:   'Lenny Bruce' Marshall   (Member)

Ah, wecome back to the best thread on this site! When people are playing poker, usually in westerns, they win with four aces (never just a pair) & the guy loses with three kings. It's always some fantastic hand.

Every. Single. Time.


even worse- sample dialog

the winner: "two pair", I win>
The other" "two pair don't beat three kings"
the winner: 2 aces plus 2 aces does

uggggggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhh!!!!
how many times Lord. How many times must we be subjected to this indignity?
bruce

 
 Posted:   Nov 18, 2012 - 7:45 PM   
 By:   'Lenny Bruce' Marshall   (Member)

the awful "stay here, dont move till i come back" cliche has been used over and over on REVOLUTION

 
 Posted:   Nov 18, 2012 - 11:18 PM   
 By:   Buscemi   (Member)

Favorite poker game in a movie: The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou.

Goldblum: I fold.
(Pirate shoots Goldblum in the head but when Zissou and company find him, his wound is now on his stomach.)

 
 
 Posted:   Nov 19, 2012 - 4:35 AM   
 By:   CinemaScope   (Member)

the awful "stay here, dont move till i come back" cliche has been used over and over on REVOLUTION

Yeah, & the:

"but we've gone over this plan 50 times"

"yeah, but let's go over it one more time"

And you know they haven't really gone over the plan 50 times, & the one more time is of course for the audience. Someone may have already pointed that out (maybe me), but I'm not going to check.

 
 
 Posted:   Nov 19, 2012 - 5:10 AM   
 By:   Tall Guy   (Member)

Jack, a proper headbutt involves the strong convex of bone at the front of your head and the squishy cartilage of the other guy's nose. You don't have to exert so much force that you knock out the other guy, just enough to inflict pain, blurring of vision (through immediate eye-watering) and disengagement from the struggle. Accuracy of the headbutt is much more important than force. Done properly, it doesn't actually do the butter remotely as much damage as it would the buttee.

TG



You've done a lot of this, have you? wink

Den




Only when people have opinions on something when they haven't even seen it... smile

TG

 
 Posted:   Nov 19, 2012 - 8:29 AM   
 By:   Heath   (Member)

The bad guy is about to shoot/whack the good guy... but then gets shot/whacked out of frame by an out-of-view "friend of good guy" who has crept up from behind with microseconds to spare.

Every goddamned thriller I see. ENOUGH already.

 
 Posted:   Nov 19, 2012 - 9:32 AM   
 By:   Solium   (Member)

Might have been mentioned already.

When the cocky young hero accidentally bumps into his soon to be girlfriend (usually within the first 10 minutes of the story) and he finds out (usually five minutes later) she has a position of authority over him.

 
 Posted:   Nov 19, 2012 - 1:30 PM   
 By:   'Lenny Bruce' Marshall   (Member)

Might have been mentioned already.

When the cocky young hero accidentally bumps into his soon to be girlfriend (usually within the first 10 minutes of the story) and he finds out (usually five minutes later) she has a position of authority over him.


I JUST SAW THIS AGAIN RECENTLY BUT THANKFULLY FORGET WHERE!

LOL!

 
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