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Posted: |
Feb 24, 2015 - 9:32 PM
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By: |
manderley
(Member)
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Mike.....Condolences from Manderley's family---people and kitties---too!
Since 1990, we've had 13 cats, for various periods of time. We've never gone out looking for them, they've simply arrived at our doorstep needing to be taken in for various reasons. Many of them were older cats who had been abandoned in our neighborhood, particularly, we think, during difficult financial times. So, depending on the situation, and the age when they arrived here we've lost 9 of the cats in that time, and now have a family of four, a mother and her two females and one male.
The mother, whom my partner named "Mother Courage", and who we now refer to as "Courage", had her 3 babies in our azalea flowerbed, and, after we rescued them and after Courage nursed them and got them ready for life, we took all of them into the house after their shots, spaying and neutering, and ID chips were done.
Like all the others of the past, each has a unique personality, and they are all loving and very social with us. We talk to them and rub them each day, and I believe they think of us as large dominant cats. "Courage," and the others, "SnowShoes", "Lena", and "Berrie" are delightful companions and a wonderful part of our family, just as were the previous ones.
We loved them all and copious tears were shed when each had to go over the "Rainbow Bridge". Our experiences are that most of them died of old age---usually around 16-20---and brought on by things like urinary issues, thyroid conditions, and various forms of cancer. Over the years we've spent a lot of money on their care, and even near the end, when you try even harder to help them and it's really not possible, you still feel guilt and helplessness about that. We can only remind and convince ourselves that they had far better lives under our care than if they'd been out on the street somewhere or abused in some unsympathetic person's anti-cat world.
So, after our appropriate mourning time, we remember how much we loved and cared for each other, us for them and them for us, and don't beat ourselves up too much over the natural end of their lives.
You WILL want to have another cat. They fulfill a particular need, I think, and add immeasurable pleasure to a family's life. If we didn't have any, and the financial issues were not a question, I think I'd want to add two instead of one, because our observation is that two together are good companions and playmates for each other.
Sorry to go into this long-winded tale, Mike, but we DO understand the sadness in your family right now and how hard it is to let go. But that immediate sadness will ebb, and you'll be left with wonderful images and moments with your animal to remember.
RIP, Spooky!
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Posted: |
Feb 25, 2015 - 5:06 PM
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By: |
edwzoomom
(Member)
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Thanks for your comments, folks. I took his remains to the vet's office to be cremated a bit earlier. We had wanted to bury him in the garden out back beside our previous cat, but the ground is frozen solid from recent single below freezing spells and two snows.
And erik's link to the poem reminded me of Hachi: A Dog's Tale, a wonderful movie that made me cry like a baby before  If I watch it tonight, look out !
We'll get another cat, and soon. Just as we did before getting Spooky. Not having that other life in the house is missed immediately. Usually this time of day, I'd be here on one sofa , he'd be on the smaller sofa sleeping and I could just look over and whisper his name to get him to sleepily look up and go "huh ?" so I could blow him a kiss.
Umm..yeah, I'd do that  He was my little man.
OMG Mike, you probably won't believe this but after I read your email I watched Hachi, A Dog's Tale and could have kicked myself for doing it. I cried all afternoon. My son came in and said "mom, why do you do this to yourself?". I think it was almost cathartic.
When the time is right, another baby will enter your lives but Spooky will always be there as well.
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Posted: |
Mar 1, 2015 - 7:16 AM
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By: |
MikeP
(Member)
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Thanks for your comments, folks. I took his remains to the vet's office to be cremated a bit earlier. We had wanted to bury him in the garden out back beside our previous cat, but the ground is frozen solid from recent single below freezing spells and two snows.
And erik's link to the poem reminded me of Hachi: A Dog's Tale, a wonderful movie that made me cry like a baby before If I watch it tonight, look out !
We'll get another cat, and soon. Just as we did before getting Spooky. Not having that other life in the house is missed immediately. Usually this time of day, I'd be here on one sofa , he'd be on the smaller sofa sleeping and I could just look over and whisper his name to get him to sleepily look up and go "huh ?" so I could blow him a kiss.
Umm..yeah, I'd do that He was my little man.
OMG Mike, you probably won't believe this but after I read your email I watched Hachi, A Dog's Tale and could have kicked myself for doing it. I cried all afternoon. My son came in and said "mom, why do you do this to yourself?". I think it was almost cathartic.
When the time is right, another baby will enter your lives but Spooky will always be there as well.
Heh...ummm yeah maybe not the best movie choice at that time? I love that movie and have cried each time we watched it. It's been tempting to watch it again to just help me have a good cry over my buddy
We've been talking about when to get another cat, we'll probably go look this week.
And still, when I get home from work, I catch myself stepping through the doorway and looking over to the couch where he'd be most nights when I came in.
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Posted: |
Mar 2, 2015 - 1:19 PM
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By: |
edwzoomom
(Member)
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Yes I agree Mike, my timing was lousy for sure. Just last night we were talking about our beloved Applehead Siamese we lost in 2010. Before we were learned the hardest lesson we ever learned, we used to let Dusty (short for Dust Bunny) outside. He refused to stay in and would scratch everything in sight to be let out. We live in a quiet, woodsy neighborhood and he came home safely for 13 years. Well, one night he didn't. We were devastated when we learned that coyotes had been seen in the area for at least a week or two. The heartbreak was beyond belief. I mourned for myself but for my husband more. Dusty was his buddy. They were never apart. When my husband worked on his boat, Dusty sat in the captain's chair and supervised. When my husband fished in the lake behind our house, Dusty was there to greet each fish he pulled in. When he worked on the car, Dusty sat on the hood or even in the seat. The habit my husband cherished most was how Dusty greeted him each and every night when he arrived home from work. Dusty would get up on the fence post the minute he heard my husband's truck and walk in the house with him. When we decided to take the fence down, we actually left that fence post up so that Dusty would still have it to sit on. Our neighbors never asked why we left that one lonely post standing. I quietly had it removed later in 2010 to ease the pain when my husband came home from work each night.
When we talked about Dusty yesterday, he said the one thing he still misses is his buddy greeting him each night. I could see the sadness in his face still. So you see Mike, you have plenty of company.
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