When Thor was just a little boy He asked his father “What should I be? Should I be Jerry? Should I be John?” Here’s what Dad said to ... he “Wash your mouth out, Thor, and get your arse down the store. What WOULD you buy Jerry for? John for evermore.”
(Then he realised he meant Jerry Fielding, so took it all back)
Bill, this isn't the limerick thread David is referring to because on THIS side of the board, TG started one called the Original filmscore limerick thread. That one never shows up on the search engine. TG's thread has a lot of limericks on it. The one Bruce pulled up on the other side has only a few limericks.
When Thor was just a little boy He asked his father “What should I be? Should I be Jerry? Should I be John?” Here’s what Dad said to ... he “Wash your mouth out, Thor, and get your arse down the store. What WOULD you buy Jerry for? John for evermore.”
(Then he realised he meant Jerry Fielding, so took it all back)
Here's my spin on I Was Kaiser Bill’s Batman (Cook/Greenaway)
Yes, I Was Kaiser Bill’s Batman
I’m telling you, cause it is true, Yes, I was Kaiser Bill’s Batman! Listen to me, then you’ll agree, Yes, I was Kaiser Bill’s Batman! He never knew, my ID, true; Tho I was Bill’s “Caped Crusader”! I wore my cape and mask; No questions asked. Yes, I was Kaiser Bill’s Batman!
I battled crime, won ev’ry time, Yes, I was Kaiser Bill’s Batman! Criminals quaked, oh, how they’d shake! Cause I was Kaiser Bill’s Batman! He never knew, my ID, true; Tho, I was Bill’s “Caped Crusader”! No Marvel, don’t you see? I was DC! Yes, I was Kaiser Bill’s Batman!
Okay, it’s true, I lied to you. I never was a crime fighter! I cleaned Bill’s house, guess I’m a louse. I only was a grime fighter! But I can say, there was no way, Kaiser Bill had any worries. Stronger than dirt was I, That is no lie! Yes, I was Kaiser Bill’s Batman!
Stronger than dirt was I, That is no lie! Yes, I was Kaiser Bill’s Batman!
I'm Woke - to the tune of I'm Down (Lennon/MCartney)
I'm Woke
I’m full woke but I know you can’t see You can try, but you can’t hide from me, I'm woke (I'm really woke) I'm woke (it ain’t no joke) I'm woke (I'm really woke) It ain’t no joke, cause you know I'm woke (It ain’t no joke) When you know I'm woke
You can’t say what I say you can’t say You’re a d*mned racist any old way I'm woke (I'm really woke) I'm woke (it ain’t no joke) I'm woke (I'm really woke) It ain’t no joke, cause you know I'm woke (It ain’t no joke) When you know I'm woke
You better do what I tell you and fast I’ll sic the ANTIFAcrats on your a$$ I'm woke (I'm really woke) I'm woke (it ain’t no joke) I'm woke (I'm really woke) It ain’t no joke, cause you know I'm woke (It ain’t no joke) When you know I'm woke
my name? is mike angle. job- reporter for the angle star weekly. story- the guardian angle service department. I open my story with the story of A.S.D angle John - angle second class. so angle John can you please tell about your job here at A.S.D? Well, the main part of my job is to help people though there life. You know to keep them on the right track. Well, Angle John! what is the hardest issue you have to deal with? I would say "free will". That one is hard to overcome. Some times it ends badly. You know death is coming. reporter - how do you know? Well! it's like this an Angle first-class, comes over and tells you to take a break. That when you know. I tell you free will is hard, really hard on the soul. When you go to judgment it can hurt you big time. because of no -matter what I do. In the end, it's your free will. Good or bad. reporter interrupts reporter- so there it is folks. Free will is the curse of mankind.
So Doggie, does free will curse dogs too? Keep chiming in. Jackfu and others, keep writing those poems. (And hopefully TG will start a new official FSM limerick thread that Internet ghosts won't steal.)
Smartphone, Laptop and Car Keys - to the tune of Abraham, Martin and John (Holler)
Smartphone, Laptop and Car Keys
Anybody here seen my dadblamed smartphone, Do you know where it's gone? I thought I put in in my pocket but it sure ain’t there no more, I just looked around and it was gone.
Anybody here seen my freakin’ laptop, Have you seen where it has gone? I need the stupid thing to try to catch up on my work at home, But I just looked around and it's gone.
Anybody here seen where I put my glasses, Can you tell me where they’ve gone? I always set ‘em down in the same old place so I can find them, But I just looked around and they’re gone.
Is it just me, or does my stuff just seem to vanish? Am I the only one this kind of crap happens to? It just tasks me! Oh no, now what have I done with my doggoned car keys?
Has anybody here seen my doggoned car keys, Can you tell me where they’ve gone? I wish I knew just why I’m always losing stuff I need, It makes me think my mind is gone…