Jim Phelps spends approximately 4 hours a day wearing a grass skirt, dancing in the street, and praying to the sky spirits that they will grant his wish to turn American into a fruitopia - a land of sentient fruit.
Phelps once set out on a judicious quest to prove that blondes have more fun. Unfortunately he was put in the hospital with V.D. about 5 days into the quest. He has since concluded that while blondes might have more fun, he can only factually confirm that they just have more V.D.